And you shall know the truth. And the truth will set you free

Wednesday, 4 October 2006.

ohh gosh this blog's is so dead!! :( haha. but IM BACK! haha!

anyways.. you guys are probably busy with exams i guess? but JIA YOU ALL THE WAY! 2 weeks time its my turn :( if only my exams were earlier! sorry guys.. most probably won't be goin megalife if im not playing during exam period.. yeahh. ohh did i tell you?! OMG! you guys remb this saturday where the WHOLE worship was wearing either red, white, yellow or blacK? yeah i know! it was like SO whatever!! gosh gosh gosh.

first was germaine, then sam, then me, then crys. then dale and some others! MUA HA HA. its so funnnyyy! heh. ohh well. im wondering if it'll happ again tomorrow but i don't think so.. i think that time was REALLY conincidence. what the world how do you spell that?!

anyways today was kinda weird :( ahh well. i dunno how to say. school was like WEIRD WEIRD WEIRD. like..yaaaaa! strange rather. im having a WHOLE series of science revision tests and im in the WORST bulk of tests now.. because..? THERE. IS. PHYSICS. and PHYSICS.. ohh please.. get physics off me cos its just.. its just NOT for me. yes and even worse is its combined with bio.. and physics and bio is like.. the gap is TOO big! aiya but i agree with you wei ming, i think its normal if girls fail physics too. HAH! IM NORMAL! haha! okay great im goin mad again.! hahaha.

ohh well.. yeahh.

dunno why i thought about this today.. its like WEIRD THOUGHT. WEIRD QUESTION. strange is the better word actually.. but i just thought about it. seems quite strange dude. like which side of it is wrong and right by the rules of ethics? hmmx.

anyway..

whats the difference between LEANING and DEPENDING on someone?

don't know why i thought about this.. but i thought about it when i was thinking about my walk with God. its a weird question right.. haha i mean who ever asks this?! uh no one i guess? for me no one asked me this before and now im askin my best friend and my cell this?! im MAD. haha. yeahh i think i've become MAD cos MY CHILDHOOD FRIENDS WENT ONLINE YSTD!! and OMG okay i shall admit and be honest.. i cried when they left cos we hardly went out and stuff =( but they're coming back in august next yr!! WHOOPEEE! heh. and everyone says? alisa's MAD!

okay well this is out of point.! as usual?! haha. uh okay okay i shall CHIILLLL. this girl and my class, and me keep like starring at each other then laughing. okay well i laugh more than her BUT she laughs a LOT too. HAH! so im FINE! HAHHAHA!!

WHAT THE WORLD THIS IS REALLY OUT OF POINTT! okay okay i shall CHILLLLLLLLLLLLLLL this time.. PROMISE! hah ohh i still remb there was one meaglife service where i didn't laugh. SERIOUS!!!!!!! IM NOT JOKIN! HAHAHAHAHA!! AHHAHDJKAIOHAHAH!!HAHADSHAI! okay great im going high again. uh i think i uh. got sth wrong.

ANYWAY!

hmm.. so what is the difference between depending and leaning?

ohh wait. re phrase question! (: heh.

what is the difference between leaning on God and DEPENDING on God?

i don't know if its correct thinking/ answerable and sensible question/ blah blah and blah. but i shall just share what i think about it i guess? (: ohh wells. and i REALLY hope this doesn't offend anyone,as in like public, EVERYONE cos its just my opinion but yeahh

i think for me..

i've made a mistake between LEANING on God and DEPENDING on God.. like i think there is an answer to this. its quite complicated in a sense but yeahhh. anyways.. yes i said i think i've made a mistake.

i think if we DEPEND on God, we'll be close to Him no matter what, we'll have an extreme love for Him that we're always out there making a difference, despite our fears and inadequacy. no matter how far away we feel from God.. its like each time we feel that way, we'll always go back to God again and again, and never give up. okay so then what REALLY IS the difference between LEANING and DEPENDING on God right?! this is DEPENDING.

i think..this is what leaning on God is like.

when you feel like He's far away from you.. you MIGHT like still go to Him for just a while and stuffs but after while all that fades out. you trust in Him because you want the support and the hapiness in believing in Him and not because you TRUELY love Him for dying on the cross for out sins. i mean, believing in God because we want His support to live and because of the hapiness of it isn't really wrong, but shouldn't the prior reason of why we believe in Jesus be because He died for us on the cross for our sins and we TRUELY truely love Him and trust Him for everything? like i hope my description works but.. wait i think it didn't. ahh never mind. but the point is to express my opinion. haha.

anyway.. i shall share from my view a little more. heh.

its like.. when we just LEAN on God and not DEPEND on Him, it means our relationship with Him is not like VERY STRONG. it means we're not close to Him/ as close to Him as we used to be. it means(to me), like for me, we know how much we LONG to do great things for Christ, but because of how fearful and inadequate we are, we let all that block in our way..

so well..

i REALLY hope this doesn't offend anyone.. yeahh and PLEASE tell me if it does okiee. (: ohh well um i have to eat now..

yeahh. anyway..

the whole point of this is to express my opinion.. sorry i don't know what im doin and why im doin this but..

i think..

i've been leaning on God instead of DEPENDING on God..

and seriously there is a difference if you look at the WHOLE picture from afar? yeahh.

ohh well! i have to go eat now. i'll do more thinking..

in the hope of finding my answer.

bye people. im taking a LONG break from blogging until.. 27 October which is when my exams end. (:

bye people.. but i'll still reply tags and be online. (: cya!